Denis Waitley's Ezine

 July 19, 2006
Issue 65

Denis Waitley's Homepage

 

Welcome!

 

To this issue of the Denis Waitley International online newsletter. My goal is to offer valuable, relevant, leading edge, and interesting content, with some innovative and refreshing differences from the other ezines and newsletters you may be receiving.

Warm regards,
Denis Waitley

 

P.S. Today's issue is going out to more than 52,349 weekly subscribers. If you've enjoyed this edition and found it to be valuable, then if you would do me the favor of forwarding it to your friends, family and associates, it would be very much appreciated. If they would like to subscribe, have them send an email to:  subscribe@deniswaitley.com

Many Thanks!


In This Issue.....

1. This Week's Jumpstart
2. Champion Within Article
3. Seeds of Greatness
4. Winner's Edge Coaching Tips
5. Featured Product of the Week
6. More Information

 

1. This Week's Jumpstart

While persistence is the determination to strive to achieve your ultimate goal, there is another virtue of equally great value. Persistence keeps us moving inside ourselves to see the purpose behind the purpose, but patience is the wisdom behind persistence.

Patience cautions us to focus our efforts on what we can change while accepting what we cannot. When external circumstance rains on our parade, patience is our umbrella. Rather than blaming what we cannot control, patience is the wisdom behind persistence.

It is when a goal is distant and difficult to reach that patience is an ally. Time changes everything, but with patience you can keep your desires relatively constant. If you can just hang on long enough, time will finally create the conditions in which you can succeed.

So This Week Practice Patience in Your Persistence!
-- Denis Waitley

 

2.  The Champion Within Article

Communicating with Your Middle and High School Age Child by Denis Waitley

First you listen, then you talk. The parent who takes the role of listener is in complete control. It's important to take the time to listen to your children. Don't say "in just a minute" or "not right now." Make it clear that you are listening and trying to understand your child's point of view.

Learning to listen better can help transform your relationship with your child by making him or her feel appreciated, by increasing trust, and by helping to solve problems more quickly. If you're going to give your adolescent or teen your full attention, you're going to need to become a good listener.

And to become a better listener, you're going to need to reduce or eliminate both physical and psychological barriers. Physically, you're going to want to minimize distractions so you can pay attention. You might turn off the TV or the radio, or put away your magazine. Take a deep breath (this will prevent you from interrupting and provide your brain with invigorating oxygen), and maintain eye contact as you consciously decide to listen.

You probably think you're a pretty good conversationalist, and you're probably right. But take a moment to ask yourself if you talk to your teen using open-ended versus dead-ended questions. The latter require just a "yes" or "no" answer. That's economical but not very enlightening.

Which is more typical of your conversations?

You: "Did you have a good day at school?"

Kid: "It was O.K."

That's the end of the conversation because the answer is too complex and to a child who hears it every day, it sounds automatic. So you get an automatic, routine answer.

-- or --

You: "You look like you survived the tryouts for the soccer team."

Let's say he or she responds by saying he didn't make the team and is disappointed. You could follow up by responding:

"That must be tough playing under the coach's scrutiny like that. Were you nervous?"

"Do you agree with the coach's decision?"

"Will you try out again next year?"

"If you and I play a lot this year would that help you for next year?"

"Hmmm. Sounds as if you're disappointed but determined to work to improve. Is that right?"


None of these responses would have likely followed if you just asked the dead-ended question, "Was school O.K. today?" and you would have missed an opportunity to have a more in-depth exchange. Remember, a real conversation gets two people involved, not just going through the motions.

Three issues to consider:

Timing: Teens don't want to be ignored or intruded upon so try giving them some time and distance when they come home from school. The idea is not to ignore school but try greeting them with a statement rather than a question. "You look like you survived the tryouts for the soccer team," not "How were tryouts for the soccer team?" Middle and high school is a lot about privacy so think of it as a verbal hug in the form of a statement.

Tone: Kids will often hear judgment when none is intended. A simple statement like, "You're awfully quiet today," can be taken as accusatory or empathic, and can cause your child to become unresponsive to avoid criticism. Try to make your statements specific and non-judgmental. "That must be tough playing under the coach's scrutiny like that."

Topic: Kids are more likely to respond to questions that focus on what matters to them. "If you and I play a lot this year would that help you for next year?" Take the time and make the effort to have your teen believe he or she has your full attention and is really being heard. You'll likely find that in return he or she is more willing to listen to you.

Practice the skill of listening with your teen and watch your relationship with them begin to transform!

-- Denis Waitley

This article was excerpted from Dr. Denis Waitley and Dr. Maryann Rosenthal's newest release, The Seeds of Greatness - The Value-based, Family Enrichment System for the 21st Century - to order or to learn more go to http://parenting.yoursuccessstore.com or call 877-929-0439.

 


Denis Waitley has studied, counseled and trained leaders in virtually every field including Apollo astronauts, Olympic gold medalists, Super Bowl champions, returning POW's, heads of state and Fortune 500 top executives.

Denis is recognized as a world class speaker and author and has traveled the globe sharing success ideas and strategies to thousands of companies the past 25 years. To book Dr. Waitley to speak for your company or to be part of your upcoming Regional or National Convention send an email to speaker@deniswaitley.com or call 877-929-0439 and ask for Hilary
.


 

3. Seeds of Greatness by Denis Waitley

(Excerpted from Denis Waitley's 365-Day Coaching Calendar, part of The Seeds of Greatness - The Value-Based Family Enrichment Program for 21st Century Leaders!)

February 16: As you go through a rough period with one of your kids, take a look at his or her siblings. One family member's problems have a way of affecting all of you. Today: Check each child's relationship with brothers or sisters.

March 25: Keep tabs on where your kids are and what they're doing. It's not a democracy and it shouldn't be. Today: Become more aware of you children's away-from-home activities.

June 27: Stress to you children the importance of keeping their word. Tell them not to make promises that they don't have every intention of keeping. Today: Teach that mutual trust is more valuable than money.

July 17: Call your young child in the middle of your workday just to say, "I'm thinking of you!" Today: Make the call and feel the benefits.

November 17: Teach your child the difference between the words "content" and "complacent." "Content means being happy with what you have, and "complacent" means being satisfied with what you have or what you are -- and not wishing to improve. Today: Be happy and motivated for improvement.

December 25: Encourage your children to do something nice for someone who will never find out. It's no secret what a good feeling it will bring. Today: Give a gift or your time to someone in need.


To learn more about Dr. Denis Waitley and Dr. Maryann Rosenthal's newest release, The Seeds of Greatness - The Value-based, Family Enrichment System for the 21st Century and special pricing for the first 200 and free shipping go to http://parenting.yoursuccessstore.com or call 877-929-0439.





4. The Winner's Edge Coaching Tips

Well, this is another week we'll "mix it up" a little. I'm always on the lookout great information that will help you build or inspire you in the life you desire to have, and I came across something the other day that was priceless. And since this edition of the ezine has a parent/children theme to it, I thought it would be the perfect ezine to share this. So thanks to my friend and colleague, Chris Widener, for providing this. -- DW

"No, that's what God gave you two arms for: To carry me!" -- My five-year-old daughter (Chris Widener)

Chris' Commentary:
Okay, the conversation before this: I was walking a short distance with my five-year-old daughter and my six-year-old daughter. The five year old was dragging behind and complaining that she was tired. She said, "Dad, will you carry me?" I replied, "Nope, that's what God gave you two legs for: So you can walk." Then came her amazingly quick retort: "No, that's what God gave you two arms for: To carry me!" The lessons you learn from little ones!

Action Point: What did God give you your arms for today? Take some time to be sure to build something beautiful or carry someone along or defend someone weak. Wave hello, lift something up that needs to be lifted or give someone a hug. Use your arms to make yourself successful today. Use your arms to help someone else. That's what God gave them to you for!


 

5. Featured Product of the Week - Seeds of Greatness - The Value-based, Family Enrichment System for the 21st Century

Seeds of Greatness
The Value-Based Family Enrichment Program
for 21st Century Leaders by Dr. Denis Waitley and Dr. Maryann Rosenthal

The instruction manual that should have been
delivered with each child.

 

  • 10 Core Roots and Wings
  • Tips for Younger Kids,
  • Teens,
  • Blended Families
  • Achievement Lifeguide
  • Perpetual Coaching Calendar
  • Free Shipping*
  •   For all the details and to order - http://www.deniswaitley.com or call 877-929-0439


     

     

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    Credit Statement
    Reproduced with permission from Denis Waitley's Weekly Ezine. To subscribe to Denis Waitley's Weekly Ezine, go to www.deniswaitley.com or send an email with Join in the subject to subscribe@deniswaitley.com Copyright © 2006 Denis Waitley International. All rights reserved worldwide.

    All contents Copyright © 2006 Denis Waitley International except where indicated otherwise. All rights reserved worldwide. Duplication or reprints only with express permission or approved Credits (see above). All trademarks are the property of their respective owners.

    Denis Waitley International
    2835 Exchange Blvd., Suite 200
    Southlake, TX 76092
    877-929-0439
    International and/or Dallas/Ft Worth - 817-442-5407
    Fax 817-442-1390 or email speaker@deniswaitley.com

     

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