June 15, 2005
Issue 37
Welcome!
To this week's issue of the Denis Waitley International online
newsletter. My goal is to offer valuable, relevant, leading
edge, and interesting content, with some innovative and
refreshing differences from the other ezines and newsletters
you may be receiving.
Special Note: Dr. Maryann Rosenthal and I have just
completed a pure labor of love -
The Seeds of
Greatness - The Value-based, Family Enrichment System for
the 21st Century. So today's issue includes articles
and quotes excerpted from this new release. Enjoy!
Warm regards,
Denis Waitley
P.S. If you've enjoyed this week's edition and found it to
be valuable, then if you would do me the favor of forwarding
it to your friends, family and associates, it would be very
much appreciated. If they would like to subscribe, have them
send an email to:
subscribe@deniswaitley.com
Many Thanks!
In This Issue.....
1. Weekly Jumpstart
2. Champion Within Weekly Article
3. Weekly Seeds of Greatness
4. Winner's Edge Coaching Tips
5. Featured Product of the Week
6. Bonus Article - How to Say "No" to Your Middle School/High School Age Children by Dr. Maryann Rosenthal
7. More Information
1. Weekly Jumpstart
Integrity: The Real Bottom Line
A simple motto hung on the living room wall of my
grandparents’ small frame house, where many seeds for my development were
planted. My grandmother and grandfather didn't talk about the lines; they lived
them.
Life is like a field of newly fallen snow;
where I choose to walk, every step will show.
They believed you were either honest or you weren't. There
was nothing in between, no such thing as partial honesty. Integrity, a standard
of personal morality and ethics, is not relative to the situation you happen to
find yourself in and doesn't sell out to expediency. Its short supply is getting
even shorter -- but without it, leadership is a facade.
Learning to see through exteriors is a critical development in the transition
from adolescence to adulthood. Sadly, most people continue to be taken in by big
talk and media popularity, flashy or bizarre looks, and expensive possessions.
They move through most of their years convinced that the externals are what
count, and are thus doomed to live shallow lives. Men and women who rely on
their looks or status to feel good about themselves inevitably do everything
they can to enhance the impression they make -- and do correspondingly little to
develop their inner value and personal growth. The paradox is that the people
who try hardest to impress are often the least impressive. Devotion to image is
often for the money it can reap. Puffing to appear powerful is an attempt to
hide insecurity. If only we could see many of our celebrities when their guard
and pretenses were down!
The myth that all that counts is bottom-line success often leads to fleeting stardom and ultimate defeat. Ask a thousand has-beens. There are no degrees of integrity. Just as you're pregnant or you're not, you have it or you don't.
-- Denis Waitley
2. The Champion Within Weekly
Article
Stress Management for Elementary Age Children by Denis Waitley
The burden of growing up today with all of the societal
pressures is greater than it was in our day. Our society has
become more and more violent and our children are exposed to
negative influences earlier than in the past. Television
shows, movies, and video games depict graphic images of
death and destruction. All of this contributes to
desensitizing our children to violence. The message is,
"Hurry up and grow up" and this hurrying influence forces
our children to shed their innocence long before they are
ready.
Too often, maybe compensating for our own shortcomings, we
place unrealistic expectations on our kids and foster a
hectic lifestyle in which staying home and being average is
not an option. Major stress results. And sooner or later,
the energy drain on a child's system will cause the body to
fall behind in its repair work. Thus, the body will lose its
fight to stay healthy in the face of the increased energy
the child is expending.
Faced with stressful challenges every day: learning to uses
manners, the first day of school, trying out for the team,
or taking tests, a child may exhibit physical and/or
emotional symptoms. Some of the signs of stress in
elementary school age children include:
- Unexplained aches and pains
- Headaches
- Stomachaches
- Changes in sleep patterns
- Changes in eating patterns
- Nightmares
- Anxiety or other nervous habits, such as fingernail biting or frequent swallowing
- A drop in grades
- Lack of the ability to show emotion
- Refusal to go to school
- Temper tantrums
- Low self-esteem
- No desire to spend time with friends
The first step is for parents to be aware of the possible
stressors and to recognize the signs of stress. All children
will experience some of these symptoms occasionally but if
they happen too frequently, they can be detrimental to our
children's health and well-being.
Temperament refers to the way in which your child behaves
and it emerges early in life. All children have different
temperaments that they were born with. Your child's unique
temperament is relatively stable and explains how you are
able to know how he responds to people and difficult
situations. When a child's behavior is inconsistent with his
usual temperament or there is a consistent pattern of
physical or psychological symptoms, parents can begin
searching for a reason that something is wrong. Counseling
is important if your child cannot learn to cope with or
adapt to the stress he is dealing with or especially if it
related to members of the family.
Stress Management Tips:
- Listen to your children by not just listening to the words, but to the messages behind the words. Encourage them to express their feelings by sharing your own experience with stressful situations.
- Regular physical exercise and sports are a great way to help relieve the effects of stress and dissipate pent-up energy.
- If a child can’t or won’t talk about what his or her concerns, you can use artwork as a means to help them vent. Experts agree that the artwork of an angry child will look quite different than that of a child who is feeling good about himself.
- Let your kids know that it is okay for them to fail. Let your children make mistakes without the fear of punishment or rejection. Show them that mistakes are learning devices that become stepping-stones to success. Help them correct their own mistakes, without trying to cover them up or fix blame elsewhere.
- Successful families have schedules and daily routines figured out prioritizing responsibilities and activities. Children are often not mature enough to take a step back and see how to prioritize.
- We need to make sure that our children eat right and get enough sleep. A balanced diet won’t make stress disappear, but it provides the nutrients your child needs to combat stress.
Denis Waitley
This article was excerpted from Dr.
Denis Waitley and Dr. Maryann Rosenthal's newest release, The Seeds of Greatness - The Value-based, Family
Enrichment System for the 21st Century - to learn more
go to
http://parenting.jimrohn.com or call 800-929-0434.
Denis Waitley has studied,
counseled and trained leaders in virtually every field
including Apollo astronauts, Olympic gold medalists, Super
Bowl champions, returning POW's, heads of state and Fortune
500 top executives.
Denis is recognized as a world class speaker and author and
has traveled the globe sharing success ideas and strategies
to thousands of companies the past 25 years. To book Dr.
Waitley to speak for your company or to be part of your
upcoming Regional or National Convention send an email to
speaker@deniswaitley.com or call 877-929-0439 and ask
for Hilary.
3. Weekly Seeds of Greatness by
Denis Waitley
(Excerpted from Denis Waitley's 365-Day Coaching Calendar, part of the New Release,
The Seeds of Greatness - The Value-Based Family Enrichment Program for 21st Century Leaders!)
February 16: As you go through a rough period with
one of your kids, take a look at his or her siblings. One
family member's problems have a way of affecting all of you.
Today: Check each child's relationship with brothers or
sisters.
March 25: Keep tabs on where your kids are and what
they're doing. It's not a democracy and it shouldn't be.
Today: Become more aware of you children's away-from-home
activities.
June 27: Stress to you children the importance of
keeping their word. Tell them not to make promises that they
don't have every intention of keeping. Today: Teach that
mutual trust is more valuable than money.
July 17: Call your young child in the middle of your
workday just to say, "I'm thinking of you!" Today: Make the
call and feel the benefits.
November 17: Teach your child the difference between
the words "content" and "complacent." "Content means being
happy with what you have, and "complacent" means being
satisfied with what you have or what you are -- and not
wishing to improve. Today: Be happy and motivated for
improvement.
December 25: Encourage your children to do something
nice for someone who will never find out. It's no secret
what a good feeling it will bring. Today: Give a gift or
your time to someone in need.
To learn more about Dr. Denis Waitley and Dr. Maryann
Rosenthal's newest release, The Seeds of Greatness - The
Value-based, Family Enrichment System for the 21st Century
and special pricing for the first 200 and free shipping go
to
http://parenting.jimrohn.com or call 800-929-0434.
4. The
Winner's Edge Coaching Tips
Welcome to our Winner's Edge Coaching Tips. Our 10-week
series of tips is going to make you smile, both on the
inside and the out! Here is our third tip of our Ten Action
Steps to Optimism!
Listen to upbeat, inspiring music. When you are getting
ready for work or school turn on the radio to a good
station. Stay away from the morning TV news. You can brief
yourself by scanning the news section on the front page of
The Wall Street Journal or New York Times. It will inform you
of all you need to know about the international and national
situation affecting your life. Read local news for interest
concerning your profession and your family. Resist the
temptation to waste time reading the sordid details of
someone else's tragedies. Listen to inspirational music or
instructional CDs in your car. If possible, have breakfast
and lunch with an optimist. Instead of sitting in front of
the TV at night, spend time listening to and being involved
with those you love.
This week feed and nourish your mind and body with optimism,
hope and positive information!
DW
5. Featured
Product of the Week
Seeds of Greatness
The Value-Based Family
Enrichment Program
for 21st Century Leaders by Dr. Denis Waitley and
Dr. Maryann Rosenthal
The instruction manual that should have been
delivered with each child.
|
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10 Core Roots and Wings
Tips for Younger Kids,
Teens,
Blended Families
Achievement Lifeguide
Perpetual Coaching Calendar
Free Shipping*
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For all the details and to order -
http://www.deniswaitley.com |
6. Bonus Article!
How to Say "No" to Your Middle School/High School Age Children by Dr. Maryann Rosenthal
Parents who establish rules of behavior have better
relationships with their adolescents and teens – and a
significantly lower incidence of smoking, drinking, and
using illegal drugs. Specifically, how can you give
intelligent direction? Well, for starters, there's no way
around it: You've got to get involved. Spend time with your
teens. Ask questions. Listen to the answers. Observe. Then
come up with some rules.
You don't want to treat them like tiny children. But you do
want to make it clear that you're still in charge. Don't
unconditionally approve or accept everything your teen does.
Remind them—and yourself—that saying "no" can be an act of
love.
Here are some ideas to govern rule making:
- Try to give a reason for every rule. Don't just say, "Because I've decided that's the way it's going to be!" or "I just know better!" Emphasize your love for them, what your concern is about the activity, and why this rule will help the teen become an independent adult.
- Don’t be lured into debating the rule. Just state your rationale; it's important to always give a reason. Don't yell to get your point across. If you do lose your temper, apologize later on after you've calmed down. You don't have to apologize for how you feel, just for blowing up.
- Then say what the rule will be. Ask for the teen's reaction, of course. The idea is to enforce the rules while keeping the lines of communication open.
- Accept feedback. Take into account your child’s perspective.
- Resist the idea of arguing the pros and cons. "My job as a parent is to make sure you have a wonderful childhood, but it's more important that you become the wonderful, competent adult that I know you'll be."
Take punishment, for instance. If the teen comes home at
11:45 p.m. when he or she was supposed to be home by 10,
don't just drop it. Follow through with the punishment,
whatever it is. You'll be sending the message that there are
boundaries, we do need to follow them, and bad outcomes
occur when we don't. The punishment doesn't need to be
harsh, but it needs to be prompt and clearly stated.
Most kids have, we believe, a sense of fairness. They may
not praise you for putting restrictions on them. But at some
level, they acknowledge the rightness of reasonable
rules—especially if you leave open the possibility of
phasing out the rules as your child proves his or her
maturity and judgment.
Dr. Maryann Rosenthal is a national authority on family dynamics and life achievement issues. A highly-regarded clinical psychologist, she is a much sought-after keynote speaker and seminar leader on how to instill self-discipline and self-leadership skills in adults, adolescents, and young children. Maryann is a champion for women, children and the elderly. She is a member of the Domestic Violence Council and a founding member of the Elder Abuse Prevention Project. Dr. Maryann is a member of the American Psychological Association and the Association of Christian Therapists. She is the mother of seven children and five grandchildren.
This article was excerpted from Dr. Denis Waitley and Dr. Maryann Rosenthal's newest release,
The Seeds of Greatness - The Value-based, Family Enrichment System for the 21st Century to learn more go to
http://parenting.jimrohn.com or call 800-929-0434.
7. More Information
Ezine Archives - To review previous issues of Denis Waitley's Weekly Ezine,
please go to: Ezine Archives
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